9/28/23: One day at a time, my friend: Remembering Martin Perrotta

By Aaron Bracy

September 28, 2023

@Aaron_Bracy

Martin Perrotta knew a lot about seemingly everything and seemingly everything about a lot. Gifted with the pen and the pick, he was just as comfortable quoting Shakespeare as the Stones. He could write like the former and play like the latter.

Fame and fortune, with his smarts and talents and good looks, maybe could have been all his. But Marty’s life mission was greater than riches. It was more lasting, more loving. Family, friendships and lending a helping hand are what mattered most to him.

He was a mentor, confidant and guiding light to so many.

Marty died on Wednesday, just five days before his 73rd birthday after a courageous, three-year battle with cancer. He leaves behind his wife of 25 years, Susan; brothers Peter, Rich and Victor and sister Cathy; three children, Aaron, Adam and Andy; and eight grandchildren, Taylor, Sydney, Jordan, Isabella, Drew, Gabe, Julia and Evelyn. He is predeceased by his brother Joseph and parents Jessi and Hannah. He also has many extended family members and countless friends.

A remembrance of his life will be held on Monday, October 2 at Mount Laurel Home for Funerals, 212 Ark Rd, Mt Laurel Township, NJ 08054. Visitation is from 6-7 p.m., followed by a memorial service from 7-8 p.m.

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To whom now will his friends and family turn?

They won’t have to dig deep, look far or think too hard. They will just remember Marty’s words.

“One day at a time, my friend,” Marty repeated when asked for advice.

One day at a time.

It was Marty’s M.O., and why he seemed forever at peace, whether reading from his immense collection of literature, writing riveting poetry, beautifully strumming his acoustic guitar or philosophizing about life. Or just being himself.

One day at a time.

So simple, yet so profound.

He had a presence about him. It’s one reason why so many turned to him for guidance. And his messages always seemed to hit just right.

“He always helped in times of need, always with a kind word and answer to your problems,” Rich said.

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Martin Perrotta was born and raised in The Bronx, N.Y. He excelled in school, graduating from Evander Childs High School before finishing at the top of his class at Mercer County College. Following Mercer, Marty completed his undergraduate degree in Philosophy from New York University and then earned a law degree from the University of Akron.

After a year off to run a fruit stand in Cape May, something he fondly recollected on extended family summer sojourns to Cape May Point, Marty began his law career.

And that’s where another family enters his life.

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Young, single, handsome and with money in his pocket from a successful general law practice, Marty had a lot going for him. But he wanted more. Not more wealth. He wanted a family.

When Marty met Susan in 1985, she was recently divorced, still young and pretty, but other potential relationships ended when it was discovered that she had three kids under 10 years old. Marty wasn’t turned off by the kids, though. Quite the contrary.

Like a Godsend, Marty entered Susan’s life just when her and the kids – Aaron, Adam and Andy – needed him the most.

With his steady income, he helped to lift Susan out of financial difficulty and provided the companionship and love she needed and deserved. For the children, he helped to settle their emotional tidal waves, being the regular male role model that they desperately wanted and needed.

“Love trumps all,” Rich said. “You accept the children. You love the whole package. Marty knew that. That’s the kind of guy he was.”

Marty immediately became a steadying force for Susan and the kids and remained one until his final breath.

“He taught us riding a bike, being a man and everything in between,” Andy said. “Every kid has superheroes, and he was mine.”

It’s true that superheroes don’t always wear capes. Some teach you chess and Chaucer, Risk and rhyme scheme.

And are a mentor, positive role model and best friend.

And a great father.

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Marty had a profound impact on so many. Peter idolized Marty. Because Marty played the guitar, Peter learned the guitar. Because Marty went to college, Peter went to college.

“In short,” Peter said, “he was my hero. I always wanted to be like him. He was my standard.”

Peter felt Marty’s kindness as a child whenever Marty allowed his younger brother to tag along, which was whenever Peter wanted.

“He never excluded me,” Peter, choking back tears, said. “Marty’s friends were my friends.”

After the family moved from The Bronx to Levittown, Pa., Marty, then about 18 years old, drove a 1965 Chevrolet Impala. Never too cool for anyone, Marty put 9-year-old Rich in the passenger seat.

“I thought I was the coolest kid,” Rich said, fondly recalling the memory. “I looked up to him.”

Marty’s positive effect on others gets told and re-told in different forms. He doted on Taylor and Sydney, his first two grandchildren. As with others, he poured love and support on them.

And kindness.

Noticing a television commercial of impoverished children, then 11-year-old Taylor asked Marty why there were children experiencing poverty. So, he became a financial supporter of a young girl in Guatemala.

Right then, he showed his granddaughter the power and importance of love and compassion.

“That changed my life,” Taylor said.

Similarly, he touched so many with his warmth and generosity.

“He would give you the shirt off his back and the last dollar he had if he felt you needed it,” Victor said. “He was one of the best people who ever walked the face of this Earth.”

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And he was one of the coolest and funniest, too. After leaving his law practice, Marty transitioned to an eventual career with the New Jersey parole board with a stopover as a high school teacher. Marty By Nature was born, dropping bars and knowledge and laughs and more knowledge on every teen in his path.

Later, he would instruct college level classes in English literature and composition at Rowan University. If he wasn’t Marty By Nature then, he still was delivering knowledge and laughs and relating challenging content in an understandable way with his easygoing style.

Marty made kids laugh – even if a bit corny at times. Some of his jokes were told and re-told and re-told again, always to laughs.

Adults loved his lines, too. He might make you blush with some jokes. But that was part of his charm, part of what drew people into him, part of why he was so beloved.

And he was cool, too. His grandkids and probably any youngster with whom he interacted will tell you that.

Marty always managed to stay ahead of the curve and could converse in the latest lingo with teens in ways foreign to many adults.

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There was a seriousness to Marty, too. Besides his intense study of literature, Marty dedicated himself for the last three decades to his sobriety. He always made time for anyone experiencing a similar path, just a text, email or phone call away for support. His daily commitment to sobriety was another in a long list of admirable qualities, adding to kind, smart, wise, caring, helpful, funny, talented, generous, unselfish…the list could go on.

Most of all, Marty had love.

Love for friends.

Love for family.

Love for anyone, really.

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The Godfather was one of Marty’s favorite movies, and he quoted the film’s lines often.

In one scene, Don Corleone tries to impart some wisdom indirectly on his son, Santino.

“Do you spend time with your family?” Don Corleone asks. “Good. Because a man who doesn’t spend time with his family can never be a real man.”

With his smarts and talents, maybe Marty could have been rich. But Marty didn’t live in could have been. He chose the present and living a life where he put his family and friends first.

He did that every day, one day at a time.

Yes, Don, he spent time with his family and friends.

Marty was a real man. As real as they get.

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Aaron Bracy has been covering Philadelphia sports since 1997. His byline regularly appears on Associated Press stories. Follow on Twitter: @Aaron_Bracy.